I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
