Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
