he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
