is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize