Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?