i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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