You work out of a Hotel?
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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