Taylor Swift is so right about you.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
