The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
