I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
