if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
