hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
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