Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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