Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize