finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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