My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize