Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
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