im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
