She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
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