Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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