you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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