Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...

(603): View more from New Hampshire

dibs.

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(203): the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces... (603): dibs. http://tfl.nu/d3kw

Replies (30) Good night (965) Bad night (2184)
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(509): View more from Washington

I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM

(909): View more from California

I'm scared to ask why.....

(509): View more from Washington

1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.

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(509): I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM (909): I'm scared to ask why..... (509): 1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare. http://tfl.nu/ztpp

Replies (13) Good night (4850) Bad night (948)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you

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(615): Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you http://tfl.nu/wyc5

Replies (8) Good night (3846) Bad night (657)
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(219): View more from Indiana

about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?

(219): View more from Indiana

yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?

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(219): about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town? (219): yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes? http://tfl.nu/jl45

Replies (5) Good night (2318) Bad night (675)
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(248): View more from Michigan

There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."

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(248): There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding." http://tfl.nu/ytsu

Replies (5) Good night (1765) Bad night (1133)
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(425): View more from Washington

He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."

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(425): He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit." http://tfl.nu/w4dk

Replies (8) Good night (2081) Bad night (621)
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(813): View more from Florida

EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?

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(813): EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order? http://tfl.nu/uphg

Replies (29) Good night (3809) Bad night (670)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.

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(910): Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times. http://tfl.nu/h23j

Replies (10) Good night (3381) Bad night (552)
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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.

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(267): They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment. http://tfl.nu/jokz

Replies (3) Good night (2083) Bad night (502)
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(506): View more from New Brunswick

there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits

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(506): there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits http://tfl.nu/dkmo

Replies (4) Good night (629) Bad night (1107)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.

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(479): Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine. http://tfl.nu/rrcc

Replies (3) Good night (1863) Bad night (583)
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(816): View more from Missouri

the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight

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(816): the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight http://tfl.nu/st8j

Replies (3) Good night (1691) Bad night (307)
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(817): View more from Texas

Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!

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(817): Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude! http://tfl.nu/8kar

Replies (3) Good night (711) Bad night (372)
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(618): View more from Illinois

Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?

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(618): Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher? http://tfl.nu/1k5x

Replies (3) Good night (309) Bad night (329)
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(248): View more from Michigan

By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.

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(248): By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it. http://tfl.nu/tqx4

Replies (4) Good night (832) Bad night (267)

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