Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
he wants to bone in the snuggie
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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