her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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