honey bunches of taint.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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