One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
