You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
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