Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
