I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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