i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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