i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
