Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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