So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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