he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Randomize
