Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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