Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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