Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
