I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
