How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
