So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
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