love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
