Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
