Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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