Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
