i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I cut my penus on the lid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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