i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize