If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
