last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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