the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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