Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.