I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
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I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
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Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.